Friday, November 5, 2010

Cleaning up after the war

Much has happened during the past year.

Devin (and myself) survived his (our) first year of Kindergarten. I do have to tell you was hell. At the beginning of the school year, I had visions of dancing and twirling in slow motion with his teacher through endless fields of flowers with nothing but blue skies over head and the leafy green trees clapping us along in the breeze.............................SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEECH. BumP

That was the sound of my dream being ran over and killed. My visions left me ill prepared for the year long turmoil and battle. Perhaps I placed too much faith in mankind or teachers or the whole school system. But, who wouldn't? Aren't you supposed to be able to trust your child's teacher's judgement? I did. Even when I didn't fully understand it, I backed her recommendations 100% in hopes that the year would turn progressive and Devin would start moving along.

But, week after week, Devin would get off the bus with his head already hanging down because he had another bad day. Siiiiiigh. There's nothing worse than watching your child's self worth diminish. Well, I'm sure there is, but last year...there wasn't.

Have I ever mentioned to you all the hatred I have for the color system that is used in the school systems. It varies from school to school in appearance. Some teachers try to call it the stop light system like that is supposed to make humilation more fun. Basically, each child starts on green. If they violate a rule, they are called upon to walk to the front of the room and move their marker to yellow which serves as a warning. If another violation is made they move to blue which serves as a note home. If another violation is made they move to red which results in a visit to the principal. However, there is no standard set of rules of use and teachers can move you to whatever color they want whenever. The color system was the bane of mine and Devin's existence last year...along with his teacher who I finally figured out had a personal vendetta against my then 6 year old.

I could fill this whole blog with Devin's Kindergarten adventures and how every faculty member in that school now knows both me and my child by first name. I could fill posts with the countless visits I made to his school to speak with librarian's, paraprofessionals, his teacher and the principal. But, I'll let them filter out little by little as my mood suits me.

Last year was hard. This year has kicked off swimmingly (I've really been wanting to use that word lately)! His teacher works very well with Devin. His new tutor works well with Devin. The paraprofessionals work well with Devin. I keep holding my breath waiting for the ball to drop, but so far it hasn't.

A few things I learned last year...

  • I had to learn that my child does read people and that just because someone is older than him doesn't make him wrong.

  • I learned that adults are more judgemental and less patient than I gave them credit for.

  • I learned that not all adults are as judgemental and impatient as I was learning.

  • I learned that even though I'm only one person, I can stand up to an entire school and make a change.

  • I learned that I may not have a degree but that doesn't make me inferior and that I CAN stand up.

  • I learned that you need to hold the tears in until you get to the car or at least outside of the office! (learned that the hard way)

  • I learned that it's hard to put your foot down when snot is running in your mouth, you can't see through the tears and the principal can't understand anything blubbering out of your fat mouth.

  • I learned that my (then fiancee) husband argues how I do things at home but will back me 150% when push comes to shove. (Usually to the point that I would NOT allow him to go to school meetings with me)

  • I learned that second guessing myself doesn't make me a crap-ass parent. It means that I care and allows me to re-assess myself.

  • I learned to lean on the people who love my kids, the ones who always see the positive. Their love for Devin helped me when I felt like I was battling a negativity laser beam reflecting it's red dot on the center of Devin's forehead.

  • I learned that when Nuby starts school next year that I will be prepared for whatever the school may throw at me. But, with his laid back personality, it probably won't be much.

Oh, the stories to tell you all!

Not to leave out Nuby and Peyton...

They are both doing wonderful. They both attend preschool together now. Nuby is slowly converting Peyton over to the dark side of being an insomniac with him. Will I ever sleep? All three of them are getting so big so quick. They all walk, talk, wipe their own butts and feed themselves. What's a mom to do with herself.....oh yeah, blog.

Till tomorrow...or whenever my friends.

1 comment:

  1. That traffic light system sounds horrible. They should have things up on walls to praise children not down right undermine them.


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