Well, the holidays are over and that means back to the grind for me. I went back to work on Monday and my school break is over too. That means I was in work shock this week pretty much. I think I forgot how to wake up, get all three kids dressed and go work for 8 hours. So, I settled for getting up late, taking the kids to school, sitting at work for half the day and working the other half and then going home to half ass my homework. AAAAh, what a terrific human being I turned out to be.
We did have a few funny happenings this week though.
Thursday was Chris' birthday. We usually go all out for presents in this house, but every year Chris gets harder and harder to buy for. He is about the pickiest person in the whole entire world. So, this year he decided he wanted a cold air intake for his truck and he was going to go and buy it. So, on Thursday we were just going to go out to eat with our friends. I realized while I was at work that I had not even gotten him a card and I didn't have any money on me to stop and get one. But my wondrous job allows my creativity to spill....so i cut out two big sheets of cardboard and found some old wallpaper samples in a book. With these I made the most beautiful birthday card full of coloring pages of me and the boys. Chris actually really did appreciate my hard work but after the fun was over that night and the boys were in bed, he looked all sad at me and said, "I'm kind of surprised you didn't get me a cake". I said that was silly because he hates cake and never eats it. And then he looked down and muttered something about not getting to blow any birthday candles out. Now, I felt like an all out piece of crap. He says, "It's no big deal. Don't worry about it, babe. I love my card. It's just a day anyhow, right?" I am an official piece of crap. Not just any piece of crap. I am the piece of crap with nuts and corn that sneaks up on you and ravages your intestines.
Friday- Devin's teacher calls me at 3:00 to inform me that while Devin was going number two, he somehow managed to number one all over his pants, shirt and underwear. Me, being the parent who always looks ahead (sarcasm), did not have extra clothes for him at school. So, I had to scoop up Nuby and Peyton to run over to Devin's school and save him from sitting in the bathroom naked in his blanket. I take this opportunity to run home, grab Dev some clean clothes, and head off to get Chris cake and presents to try to redeem myself and hopefully salvage a little bit of birthday surprise.
At home, I leave the kids in the car and run in to grab clothes. I come back out and toss them to Devin in the back seat and tell him to hurry up and get em on. We're on a mission. I fiddle with something for a minute and glance back to check on Dev's progress. There he is, sitting spread eagle staring at his little wang with a curious look on his face.
Me-"Dev, WHAT are you doing? Get your clothes on!"
Dev- Throwing hands out in exasperation and shaking his head- "Mom, it's just like... just like, you know my pee pee's getting old."
Me- "Why is your pee pee getting old?"
Dev- Now fully enraged, getting louder and still staring down his wang- "It's just not new anymore! It's just old"
Me- "How do you know what an old pee pee looks like?"
Dev- Starts cracking up and hides his face in the door "Mom, that's silly nasty. Don't talk about my privates. I need to get dressed."
So, Devin got dressed and we headed off to wal-mart where the boys picked out a cupcake cake. It was neon pink, green and yellow and was shaped like a butterfly. Good pick, boys.
Then we went and found the wii game he has been asking for, it's the Indiana Jones lego game. After that, I gave the boys each two dollars and we ran over to the dollar tree so they could go and "buy daddy there own gift". We went in and Devin was so proud bee boppin' around holding his money stating loudly that this was a girl store and we needed to leave to find some tools.
Nuby ran over and picked up a doggy rope toy yelling "Dis fo my daddy". I had to tell him that was a doggy toy and daddy's not a dog (all the time he he he). I told them to keep looking and Devin settled on a flashlight while Nuby picked a tape measure. This is really funny because they each picked out the things that they always break of daddy's. So, daddy so graciously agreed that he would share his new tools if they agreed not to touch the ones he has already.
Anyways, we managed to get home and have everything wrapped and candled by the time he got home. He was surprised. So, I think I am safe for another year.